All this talk about relationships in my blog sometimes detracts from the overarching goal of self-development: happiness. Being happy in your life, with or without a relationship, is the key indicator for relationship readiness and relationship satisfaction for any man. This same rule applies to any part of your life, whether it be work, family, recreation, or friendships. If you're not happy with yourself, anything outside of you will provide temporary satisfaction at best.

Happiness can be simpler than we make it. At it's most reduced form it is a way of thinking. The pattern that defines your particular way of thinking, you have likely been doing most of your life. This way, pattern, or habit of thought determines whether you feel happy or unhappy. 

Some of the feedback I received from my posts on the use of the word "Creep" last month gave me pause, pause to explore both the male and female perspective on this word. I had an interesting discussion with a female colleague of mine who specializes in gender issues. She gave me more insight into the context and function of the word "Creep" for women, and it did start to make more sense to me. This did not settle my concern around some responses from mental health professionals as well as other comments in past discussions. Some comments were overtly diagnostic based from this concept of a creepy feeling from a man. 

Fall is here. This is exciting because this is typically the best time of year to surf in New England with the hurricanes from the South in the Atlantic pushing storm swells up North for surfers to enjoy. 

This past Tuesday the swell hit Hampton Beach in New Hampshire. All of my excitement came to a head and ended in disappointment. As I preach to all of you I decided to make the best of my disappointment. Surfing taught me another important life lesson.  

It has been awhile since I posted anything in the Inspiring Examples of Resistance series I started last year. This has not been because of any lack of inspiring stories out there, because there are many. I had my focus on other areas.

Some guys resent others to whom life comes easy. If you think about it, do you really want to be one of those guys? The moment they hit a challenge in their life they get completely thrown off, become frustrated, and give up. When push comes to shove, and success requires real effort and character, these people are the first to fail. They don’t have the strength, character, and integrity to cope with growing pains, because they have never had to grow, and maybe never will. Ultimately, if you have not tasted these growing pains you will not really appreciate the taste of success when it does come; such men will take it for granted and life will be dull for them.

This is unprecedented, but the same person has met the standard for making it onto my Inspiring Examples of Resistance series two months in a row. The month after I made an example of J.J. Watt's negativity on my blog a few weeks ago, he turns around and surprises me with an act of resilience, resisting the negativity of the most negative fan base in all of sports! 

As we continue to discuss negativity, it is important to keep in mind that if you decide to make changes in your life, that change is not an easy process. In fact your brain resists changing... Multiple different theories in psychology and neuroscience have identified the brain as seeking the familiar, the status quo, the path of least resistance; essentially the human tendency is to gravitate toward whatever baseline you have established in your life. This is a tendency that you have to be motivated to, and be ready to exert willpower to overcome.

The moment I saw this video it immediately shattered the threshold I use when I try to decide whether a feat is inspiring enough for this series. Here was a man, disabled through his service to his country, who gained a lot of weight which compounded his disability, to the point he needed heavy bracing and crutches just to move around. Everyone had given up on this man. He seems to have nearly given up on himself. But, something inside him had not fully given up… I will not go into the story, since it is pretty clearly spelled out in the video.