Have You Ever thought about feeling good about yourself just for the sake of feeling good? Without some sort of end goal like feeling good about yourself so you can find a relationship?

In our culture we are taught that to be successful you have to be goal oriented. Further we are advised that we have to make our goals very specific. There is definitely merit in this, but often the big picture gets lost in this version of goal setting. Do we have to have a reason to feel good about ourselves? Or to simply feel good? 

I say we don’t. Feeling good about yourself, in it’s own right, is reason enough. It gives that all important mantra “I am enough” the rubber it needs to meet the road and get you traction you’re seeking with your self-esteem. 

Why is this important? 

From: (---------------------------)
To: (---------------------------------)
Date received: (---------------------)
Subject: can you blame me for wanting you?

                                                          Who's steering this ship anyway?

For the past 20 years I have been helping men discover their strength, both through sharing my own personal exploration as well as professionally. This can look different for different men. For all men this happens through opening up to vulnerability. For nice guys connecting to their personal power means letting go of their people pleasing ways and being assertive. 

Negativity is common for those of us who have had a difficult life or even a series of recent bad experiences. Even if you aren’t predisposed to negative thinking it is difficult to resist negativity under the forces of hardship or social pressure. 

We are living in a very heated time when it come to male-female relationships. As a man the messages can seem contradictory and confusing. On the one hand you hear the message that men are entitled and need to respect what a woman wants, yet on the other hand you hear that women are attracted to confident men, and see women go for the jerks who do what seems disrespectful. You may have even been told to “man up” by women who are frustrated because you haven't made a move yet (but, you were trying to be respectful, right?).

Some of the feedback I received from my posts on the use of the word "Creep" last month gave me pause, pause to explore both the male and female perspective on this word. I had an interesting discussion with a female colleague of mine who specializes in gender issues. She gave me more insight into the context and function of the word "Creep" for women, and it did start to make more sense to me. This did not settle my concern around some responses from mental health professionals as well as other comments in past discussions. Some comments were overtly diagnostic based from this concept of a creepy feeling from a man.